Proof reading for a PD article

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ReHerakhte
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Proof reading for a PD article

Post by ReHerakhte » Mon Jan 02, 2017 6:35 am

Hey all,
I mentioned in an earlier thread (the one for the 2016 Halloween issue) that I had started working on The Dark Conspiracy Traveller's Guide to Australia and also that I may ask someone to read over my notes to see if the concepts I'm trying to convey are getting delivered to the reader.

I have a few paragraphs regarding the size & population density of Australia that I'd like someone who's not Australian to read to see if they make sense and are actually cohesive enough to convey the vastness and emptiness of the continent to the reader.
The paragraphs make sense to me but ya'know, I wrote them so yeah, it's no surprise that I understand what I mean!

Is anyone interested in doing a small bit of critiquing? Leave a note here or PM me and I'll send the relevant sections via PM for you to read & critique.
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Re: Proof reading for a PD article

Post by Morthrai » Tue Jan 03, 2017 7:44 pm

Feel free to throwit my way - there again I'll get to see it anyway! 8)
Lee Williams.
"Superstition is the name the ignorant give to their ignorance"

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ReHerakhte
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Re: Proof reading for a PD article

Post by ReHerakhte » Thu Jan 05, 2017 12:32 am

Morthrai wrote:Feel free to throwit my way - there again I'll get to see it anyway! 8)
True that!
Cheers Lee, the section I'm concerned with at the moment makes sense to me but I did write it so that's expected! It does seem rather clunky too so yeah, basically I'd like someone else to read it to see if it makes sense and conveys the info I'm providing.
What's the best way to send the text to you?
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Re: Proof reading for a PD article

Post by Morthrai » Thu Jan 05, 2017 12:01 pm

Send it to my regular Gmail address which you should have already :)
Lee Williams.
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ReHerakhte
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Re: Proof reading for a PD article

Post by ReHerakhte » Sat Jan 07, 2017 12:39 pm

Cheers Lee, will do.
Just sending if off now.
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Re: Proof reading for a PD article

Post by Morthrai » Wed Jan 18, 2017 5:54 pm

You might want to add this into the DC Oz thing:

http://www.ibtimes.co.uk/torrential-dow ... ck-1601071
Lee Williams.
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Re: Proof reading for a PD article

Post by ReHerakhte » Thu Jan 19, 2017 1:07 am

Interesting that you should mention that, there are a number of species of flora and fauna that have adapted to the arid climate in the same manner as the shield shrimp. It can be breathtaking to see some areas after the rains because there is a carpet of grasses and flowers blanketing the area in a blaze of colours where before there was the reds & browns of the desert. And then there's the frogs and small fishes which fill the temporary waterholes because the rain has activated their eggs.

Climate plays a big part in the character of Australia, not because it is particularly different to other places around the world but because its either a climactic condition spread over a much wider area than often found anywhere else or more specifically because it has caused adaptations in flora & fauna that are sometimes unique to this continent (I'm thinking specifically about the need for some plants here to have their seed pods burnt before they will open and release the seed as an example of these extreme adaptations).

Such things are already a part of the article but more examples are always handy and it would seem that the shield shrimp wasn't considered newsworthy here, it barely rated a mention (I can't even find a reference to it from Australian news media outside the region it occurred in except for three or four pieces published on the internet) so I can at least partly redress that by including it in my article!
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